How to calm a fussy baby

When a baby is crying and fussy. It’s their language and way of reaching out to you that something is amiss. Until you attend to that need they will not be ok. Many times my son has had a restless sleep simply because he is hungry. Another time he was fussy for like an hour simply because his shoes were too tight. How to calm a fussy baby.

How to calm a fussy baby

Why is baby fussy?

  • hunger or thirsty (I bet you are not the happiest person when hungry too)
  • fatigue (tired muscles)
  • growth sprout
  • overwhelmed
  • Needs attention
  • uncomfortable (clothes too tight, something is poking them, cold, too hot, itchy, diaper full)
  • scared
  • because they are human
  • needs a break or breather
  • doesn’t like a person
  • teething
  • Sick or unwell
  • Missing someone
  • Change in routine
  • Bored
  • Unfamiliar environment

Read for these cues and meet them to avoid the tears:

  • Rubbing face. Holding ears may mean baby is tired or teething.
  • Clenching hands may mean baby is hungry.
  • Smacking lips. And shaking head (rooting). When your baby shakes their head towards your boobs, along with smacking lips or feeding sounds and facial expressions may also mean baby is hungry.
  • Turning head away or losing eye contact may mean baby is overwhelmed.
  • Arched back may mean baby is uncomfortable.

Fussy baby

How to stay calm as a mom: (especially during tantrums)

-Count 1-20
-Look at the need and beyond the tears, tantrum.
-Understand a baby is human and is entitled to have bad moments and bad days, this does not mean that the child is bad.
-be patient.
-go to the bathroom.
-if your child is throwing a tantrum walk away to a safe distance and watch, they will probably get up and follow you. A distraction works well and change of hands to your partner or another person helps.
-Get a few minutes to yourself to calm down
-Hydrate, it’s important to stay hydrated.
-Self-care: self-care helps you to stay calm. It keeps you in a better mood to handle your days situations.

What to do as a parent.

How to calm a fussy baby.

Firstly find the trigger by trying different solutions. Since a baby won’t be able to tell you what’s wrong try these ways.

-distracting them. Sing a song, give them a bootle or milk, do an exaggerated dance, find a toy they love, play music. Be louder, attention catching and creative.
-let your partner take the reigns while you cool off.
-get on your knees, give hugs and speak in a calm way.
-remove the child from the situation. Change scenery.
-find a quite spot to relax both of you
-baby wearing.
-you may use essential oils to calm you. Such as bergamot essential oil, chamomile essential oil and lavender essential oil. Add these to your wrists using a roller bottle. Sniff straight out of the bottle or diffuse using your nebulizer.
I am an introvert and I get overwhelmed with too many people. My son is extroverted but there are times he gets overwhelmed. I then find a quiet familiar spot to calm him down. I do that for me as well.

-remove and dust clothes before putting them back. Put diaper nicely.

How to help baby calm down:

-take a walk
-baby wearing
-feed them
-change diaper
-undress if too hot, cover up if cold
-hug them
-distract them
-keep your cool ?
-speak in your happy voice
-let them cry it out (ever had such a bad day and just needed a good cry, sometimes that helps feel better but hold them while they cry, cry with them too)
-help them rest (? sleep)
-play their Favourite game
-give them your gown for a Familiar smell or hold them close to you.

How to calm a fussy baby

How to calm a fussy baby by baby massage:

Baby massage is a sure way to calm a fussy baby. Just like our bodies get tired a babies body gets weiry too and needs a massage.

What you will need.

  • ¼ cup Sunflower oil
  • 3 drops Lavender essential oil for calming
  • 3 drops Chamomile essential oil for relaxation
  • 2 drops Tea tree essential oil for its antibacterial purposes.
  • Double boiler (place a jar in hot boiling water, add essential oils into the jar to warm them while avoiding direct heat).
  • Towel
Set up the scene:
  • Close the windows.
  • Lay a towel on the bed or wherever you will give the massage.
  • Warm up the sunflower oil in a double boiler. Till it is lukewarm to warm.
  • Remove from the stove and let it cool a little.
  • Add Lavender, Tea tree, Chamomile to the sunflower oil.
  • Check the temperature of the oils using your inner wrist.
  • Play soothing music.
  • Wash your hands.
To massage:
  • Remove all clothes on the baby.
  • Rub the oils into your babies hair, gently massaging into scalp and slightly onto the top of the temples of the forehead.
  • Lay your baby on the towel. Or hold your baby if too young.
  • Remember to rub the oils in your hands first before applying onto baby.
  • Rub the oil onto the soles of your babies feet pressing with your palm.
  • Run your way up to the shoulders with slight pressure, adding a little more oil.
  • When you reach the baby’s chest and belly, spread your hands out towards the sides of the baby.
  • Put pressure in your fingertips as you spread as if you are flattening the pages of a book.
  • Use your thumbs to make small circles.
  • Spend a little more time on the back.

Therefore, After you are satisfied with the massage run the bath. Using your elbow to check the temperature. Don’t forget to use baby soap and shampoo. Rinse thoroughly.

Baby massage

Caution ⚠:

  • Keep the oils out of babies reach.
  • Avoid putting oils on the ears, eyes, mouth and private areas.
  • Remember to do a patch test first if you have never used the oils on baby.
  • Rub the oils into your hands first to make them the right temperature for baby.
  • Ensure that the room is warm and cosy during the massage.
  • If you don’t want to use essential oils, baby oil or pure sunflower oil works as well for a plain massage without essential oil properties.
  • Always exercise caution when using essential oils. A little goes a long way.

A few notes:

A baby cannot speak well at least not in a language we understand. So their best way to communicate with you is through tears. As they grow older tantrums too.

They give out cues other times they do not know how to express themselves or what’s bothering them. To parents this is translated as being fussy. Sometimes we miss these cues and only see the result (tears).

Your baby and you are people who speak different languages and we need to find a common ground where we can communicate. Mom and child both learn each other till they both understand what works.

If a child notices you only respond to tantrums, that will be their first way of communicating. Try and solve the problem before it reaches that stage.

Overall we all need love, care and attention. If your child senses you are not giving them the attention they need in the moment, they find a way to get your attention.

We as moms need to also cut ourselves some slack. We are learning too. And through trail, error and mommy instinct we will get there.
Trust that mommy instinct.

A baby is not doing things to spite you. You are their whole world and their comfort spot. They are comfortable with you and they know and trust that you will meet their needs. You are their whole world and comfort spot.


And patience: be patient with your child while keeping your cool and being patient with yourself. Knowing that this will last only a while. Your child will eventually learn to speak and grow up.

That child is yours so they will pick up on your habits. When you are stressed or uncomfortable what do you do? They may sometimes reflect you and it’s quite difficult to control what you see in them when you struggle to control it in yourself. You may use similar steps for tantrums. How to calm a fussy baby.

Disclaimer: I am no doctor, simply a mother sharing her findings. These statements have not been evaluated by the food and drug administration (FDA). These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.

Read here for more:

Baby growth sprout/

Simple ways to show love to your baby/

Wise words from motherly:

‘Yet it is so important. That moment when your baby was placed in your arms, you became an expert: an expert on how to parent your particular child. Whether or not you were academically trained—your body, mind, and soul became intimately, mysteriously, beautifully connected to your baby.

Maternal intuition gave you an ability to know things, and while it’s not objective or qualitative or will be written about in a peer-review journal, her voice is incredibly valid. Because you are biologically and spiritually programmed to care for your child in a way no one else can.’

you are not failing

In conclusion:

How to calm a fussy baby. When calming a fussy baby make sure that their diaper is clean, they have been fed, their clothes are comfortable, they are a good temperature and that they are not ill. Be sure to stay calm as a child feeds off your positive vibes. As a result your baby will be less fussy and much happier.

If your baby is not getting better. Please visit your doctor. Download your how to baby massage:


Thank you for reading, MrsChettyLife.


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